My sister posed a statement to me last night via text message and asked for my input: Losing is better than never trying. My first answer, of course, was that I never lose, and we all know that isn’t true (especially if you know how your whole day can be ruined if Lauren loses at something). As I pondered the statement I became more confused on my stance.
My final response was to not start something if you are expecting to lose, but if you give all your effort and lose that is all anybody can ask for. Holly (my sister) answered back that if you give your all then you should never lose. As much as I liked her response one example came to my mind. If I spend 90% of my waking hours dedicated to basketball there I no way I would ever beat Michael Jordan. He just has some obvious gifts that I don’t have.
As I kept thinking about this whole scenario I couldn’t help but reminisce about our high school basketball team. We were a bunch of slow, skinny white kids from an upper middle class area who worked extremely hard every day. We all loved the team so much that we would come in early, stay late, play for hours on end. Nearly every team we played that year probably should have beaten us if you matched up our natural skill and talent player by player. That being said, we won our league and beat every team in the league that year.
One attribute that Lauren and I have in common is our hatred of losing. Nearly every time we play tennis it turns into a near break-up experience. When she finally starts getting some points on me she gets mad at me for playing easy on her, but when I get points on her she gets mad at me because I am playing too hard (all the while I have been playing the same level).
So, to reply to Holly’s statement……It isn’t about winning and losing, it is about the effort you put in. If you aren’t going put the effort in then don’t start. That is the way we should live our lives, in our jobs, school, and relationships.
I like where you ended up on this question. It is about the effort. You can put in little effort and win, but not really learn much or accomplish anything. Likewise you can put in a lot of effort and lose, but learn a lot and feel like you have succeed. The outcome isn't really that important, but the effort you put in is. Good thoughts.
ReplyDeleteThis question was posed to me in a book I am currently reading, "Do Hard Things." I immediately text the question to you because I know how competitive you are and I hoped to get a rise out of you =) & I guessed that you would probably cirle the question before answering it! (If that made any sense.) In this book, these two teens are motivating other people around the world to rebel against the low expectations and values that our society holds.
ReplyDeleteOne of my biggest fears in life is failing to reach my full potential. I believe strongly that God has instilled limitless potential within each Christian through Him; but if we are not striving to reach a higher and higher potential, then we are wasting potential. I know I am repeating words, but how awful is it to have limitless potential and waste it? That is just usuless!
To stay on topic.....you are right, it is not about winning or losing, but I think we do need to learn how to accept a loss and a win. Even if it is Oklahoma State sports we are talking about! Most of all, it is about the effort because we must be striving to fulfill our God given potential. In my opinion, trying and failing is way better than never trying.
Kyle, you would fit in nicely in my golf gang. While none of us is Tiger Woods, hackers and sissies should stay home...LOL...Lauren's competitiveness definitely comes from me. I always told her if you you aren't going to keep score, don't play! We used to play HORSE and Around the World on the driveway. I never LET her win (even when she was 8 or 9). But through practice and determination, the day came when she schooled me regularly (she was deadly on the wing!). My philosophy is everything matters, just some things not as much as others....Craig C.
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